Connect with us

Featured Articles

10 Topics Of Conversation From The Cotto-Margarito PPV Party

Published

on

10 Topics Of Conversation From The Cotto-Margarito PPV Party – As I’ve noted in recent columns, I started a new job last month, and the workload is staggering. I don’t have time to shave more than once a week, I barely have time to wipe my hindquarters properly (if the workload gets any heavier, I’m going to have to sacrifice that one), and sadly, I don’t have time for my usual 3,500-word pay-per-view running diaries. So we’re going with a modified version—same vibe, less comprehensive, fewer words. It’s a top-10 list, focusing on topics of conversation between me, future Hall of Famer Nigel Collins, and semi-retired boxing writer Bill Dettloff at my Miguel Cotto-Antonio Margarito II pay-per-view party this past Saturday night. In approximately chronological order, here we go:

1. “Mediocre Mike”

Back in 2009, when Mike Jones couldn’t land a date on HBO or its pay-per-view arm, a legend was spreading about one of boxing’s brightest prospects, a young fighter the major networks were crazy to ignore. Saturday’s fight against Sebastian Lujan provided the latest bit of evidence that the reality doesn’t live up to the legend. As Jones worked his way to a credible but forgettable decision win over Lujan, Nigel dubbed him “Mediocre Mike,” which sounds about right to me. Just because a guy looks the part, that doesn’t mean he can play it. Jones is a solid boxer, a worthy top-10 contender, but he’s not showing me anything to suggest he’ll ever be a star. If the PPV watchers are spending more time marveling over how much your opponent looks like a tattoo-less Cotto than talking about you, that’s not a good sign.

2. Mrs. Cotto’s cleavage

When you see excessive cleavage in person, as Jerry and George taught us, you glance quickly and then you look away. A poke means a peek. But when you’re watching it on TV, you can go ahead and stare at the sun as long as you want. And you can definitely feel free to make crass remarks with your buddies. Melissa Cotto chose to display her assets very prominently, so we chose to ogle, insult, and eventually throw her into a game of “[Expletive], Marry, Kill” with Margarito’s wife and Jinkee Pacquiao. Sorry, Mrs. Cotto, that’s what you get when you show up for the fights dressed like you’re on call to feed newborn quadruplets.

3. Commentators wrapped up

I’m not going to disparage the broadcast crew of Jim Lampley, Max Kellerman, and Emanuel Steward; they were just doing their jobs by reporting throughout the night on the various New York State Athletic Commission-induced stupidities going on behind the scenes. The HBO cameras got great footage of what felt like a terrible pre-match pro wrestling skit, with some commission yutz hilariously referencing “Naazim whatever his name is.” And Steward made a very astute point a short while later about how closely Margarito was watching Robert Garcia wrap his hands, implying that if Javier Capetillo ever put anything in his wraps, Margarito would damned sure know about it. Unfortunately, while all of this was going on, there was an entertaining, hard-fought battle going on in the ring between Delvin Rodriguez and Pawel Wolak, and the commentators were missing key moments as they talked endlessly about hand-wrap-related topics. I’m not sure exactly how they were supposed to balance everything. I don’t have all the answers. I just know that in my living room, there were three frustrated fight fans trying to, you know, watch a fight.

4. Dettloff’s Duds

Bill strolled into my house determined to redefine 21st century fight-watching fashion, strutting down the interior hallway/catwalk sporting the look known as “Freddie Roach On The Top / Gary Shaw On The Bottom.” (Please, no jokes about preferred bedroom positions, okay?) Bill was sporting his self-styled “nerd glasses,” and with his hair having pretty much completed the transformation from reddish-blond to whitish-blond, he was a dead ringer for Coach Roach from the neck up. But from the neck down, he was comfortable as can be in a Sweatsedo. Bill doesn’t have Shaw’s physique, mind you. But with hard work behind the fork and knife, he can get there.

5. “Power Warlock”

Credit to regular reader and podcast listener (and occasional live-fight press-row stalker) Corey Lambert for tweeting this Atlas-ism to us during the Rodriguez-Wolak fight, reminding us of Teddy’s unintentional nickname for the Polish-American slugger. Probably the most enjoyable part of watching this solid action fight was during the final three minutes, when my Ring Theory “Quick Picks” competition with Bill sparked impassioned rooting. Bill wanted Wolak to last the distance and lose a decision; I could have been helped by Rodriguez getting the stoppage. It looked like it might come, but alas, Wolak held on and heard the final bell. I am now one point behind after 11-plus months of picking fights. It’s going to be a thrilling December. And I say that with both extreme seriousness (for me, Bill, and our devoted listeners) and extreme sarcasm (for the rest of the boxing world that wishes I would shut up about Quick Picks already).

6. Buffer loves him some Buffer

I’d never noticed this before (someone on Twitter claimed he’d done it at last month’s Manny Pacquiao-Juan Manuel Marquez fight too), but Michael Buffer is now reading off of index cards with a picture on the back of, you guessed it, Michael Buffer. Thank goodness the International Boxing Hall of Fame threw Buffer that bone this week and announced his impending induction. He desperately needed the boost to his flagging self-esteem.

7. A fine time for a photo op or phone call

I don’t know about you, but when I’m 45 minutes away from one of the most important—and physically perilous—moments of my career, and I’m trying to warm up and get in the zone for it, that’s probably not the best time for random photo ops and phone chats. Come see me three hours before the fight. Or after it’s over. But not when I’m finishing my final preparations. Yeah, I’m talking to you, Carmelo Anthony. And you, Swizz Beatz, you apparently famous hip-hop industry person whom I’d never heard of prior to Saturday night. And you, first lady of Mexico, whatever your name is. That Cotto and Margarito had to take breaks in the final hour before the fight for public-relations opportunities says sad things about the respect boxers are afforded and/or the lack of consideration for others from our celebrities.

8. Darchinyan defeats Rios

That little headline probably makes no sense whatsoever to you, so allow me to explain: While the rehydrated and revived corpse of Brandon Rios was putting the finishing touches on a bloody John Murray live on the big screen in front of us, Nigel, Bill, and I allowed ourselves to be distracted by the images on the computer screen on my lap, which showed Vic Darchinyan on a French game show, dressed as a mouse, running for his life in some sort of a showdown with a live bull. Nothing against the Rios-Murray fight, but this wasn’t even a contest. Vic nearly getting gored and hiding inside a giant fake wedge of cheese wins the battle for our attention every time.

9. A very braid-y Margarito

Dettloff isn’t the only one whose stylistic choices went under the microscope on Saturday night. Much discussion was also devoted to Margarito’s decision to take his long, douchey hair and put it in little, douchey braids. The verdict: No matter what he does, Margarito looks like a douche. But at least his hair didn’t get in his eyes during the fight.

10. “Just to look at him and taste my victory on him”

The Cotto-Margarito fight was fairly entertaining (if not nearly as thrilling and dramatic as their first fight) and, on the whole, satisfying. But what really stood out was Cotto’s postfight interview with Max Kellerman, where the Puerto Rican hero took advantage of the right, which he had fully earned, to be somewhat smug. When asked why he walked over to Margarito’s corner afterward, Cotto responded with the quote above. Unfortunately, the victory was mildly tainted, from my perspective. In the third round, Margarito’s surgically “repaired” right eye swelled shut, and that affected his ability to fight with Cotto on even terms. I’m not saying Cotto wouldn’t have won the fight regardless, but I’m just saying his victory was aided by his opponent’s compromised state entering the fight. And on top of that, the stoppage was somewhat debatable; certainly, Margarito was willing to fight on. Then again, if not for the controversy over the stoppage, we wouldn’t have had the pleasure of a postfight interview with a ringside doctor who seemed like a Christopher Guest character in a mockumentary, complete with turtleneck and tweed blazer. (Hey, Dettloff, I think we’ve found your look for the next pay-per-view party.)

Eric Raskin can be contacted at RaskinBoxing@yahoo.com. You can follow him on Twitter @EricRaskin and listen to new episodes of his podcast, Ring Theory, at http://ringtheory.podbean.com.

10 Topics Of Conversation From The Cotto-Margarito PPV Party / Check out more boxing news on video at The Boxing Channel.

Share The Sweet Science experience!
Continue Reading
Advertisement
Newspaperman-Playwright-Author-Bobby-Cassidy-Jr-Commemorates-his-Fighting-Father
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Newspaperman/Playwright/Author Bobby Cassidy Jr Commemorates His Fighting Father

A-Night-of-Mismatches-Turns-Topsy-Turvy-at-Mandalay-Bay-Resendiz-Shocks-Plant
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

A Night of Mismatches Turns Topsy-Turvy at Mandalay Bay; Resendiz Shocks Plant

Avila-Perspective-Chap-330-Matchroom-in-New-York-plus-the-latest-on-Canelo-Crawford
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 330: Matchroom in New York plus the Latest on Canelo-Crawford

Vito-Mielnicki-Whitewashes-Kamil-Gardzielik-Before-the-Home-Folks-in-Newark
Featured Articles4 days ago

Vito Mielnicki Jr Whitewashes Kamil Gardzielik Before the Home Folks in Newark

Vinny-Paz-is-Going-into-the-Boxing-Hall-of-Fame-Hey-why-Not-Roger-Mayweather?
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Vinny Paz is Going into the Boxing Hall of Fame; Hey, Why Not Roger Mayweather?

Remembering-the-Under-Appreciated-Body-Snatcher-Mike-McCallum,-a-Conusmmate-Pro
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Remembering the Under-Appreciated “Body Snatcher” Mike McCallum, a Consummate Pro    

Avila-Perspective-Chap-228-Viva-Las-Vegas-Back-in-the-Boxing-Spotlight
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 228: Viva Las Vegas, Back in the Boxing Spotlight

Pacquiao-is-Back,-Fabio-in-England-and-More.jpg
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap 329: Pacquiao is Back, Fabio in England and More

Opetaia-and-Nakatani-Crush-Overmatched-Foes-Capping-Off-a-Wild-Boxing-Weekend
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Opetaia and Nakatani Crush Overmatched Foes, Capping Off a Wild Boxing Weekend

Results-and-Recaps-from-Las-Vegas-Where-Melikuziev-Nipped-Fulghum-in-a-Fierce-Fight
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Results and Recaps from Las Vegas Where Melikuziev Nipped Fulghum in a Fierce Battle

Fabio-Wardley-Comes-from-Behind-to-KO-Justis-Huni
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Fabio Wardley Comes from Behind to KO Justis Huni  

Catching-Up-with-Clay-Moyle-Who-Talks-About-His-Massive-Collection-of-Boxing-Books
Featured Articles1 week ago

Catching Up with Clay Moyle Who Talks About His Massive Collection of Boxing Books

Delving-Into-'Hoopa'-With-Notes-on-Books-by-George-Plimpton-and-Joyce-Carol-Oates
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Delving into ‘Hoopla’ with Notes on Books by George Plimpton and Joyce Carol Oates

The-Shafting-of-Blair-the-Flair-Cobbs-a-Familar-Thread-in-the-Cruelest-Sport
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

The Shafting of Blair “The Flair” Cobbs, a Familiar Thread in the Cruelest Sport

Richardson-Hitchins-Batters-and-Stops-George-Kambosos-at-Madison-Square-Garden
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Richardson Hitchins Batters and Stops George Kambosos at Madison Square Garden 

More-Medals-for-Hawaii's-Patricio-Family-at-USA-Boxing's-Summer-Festival
Featured Articles2 days ago

More Medals for Hawaii’s Patricio Family at the USA Boxing Summer Festival

A-Fight-Fan-and-Teremoana-Samson-Junior-Leon-Teremoana
Featured Articles1 week ago

A Fight Fan and Teremoana Samson Junior Leon Teremoana

Callum-Walsh-Umar-Dzambekov-and-Cain-Sandoval-Remain-Unbeaten-at-Santa-Ynez
Featured Articles4 days ago

Callum Walsh, Umar Dzambekov and Cain Sandoval Remain Unbeaten at Santa Ynez

Avila-Perspective-Chap-331-Callum-Walsh-Brian-Norman-Galal-Yafai-and-More
Featured Articles5 days ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 331: Callum Walsh, Brian Norman, Galal Yafai and More

Brian-Norman-Jr-Bombs-Out-Jin-Sasaki-with-a-Frightful-Left-Hook
Featured Articles7 days ago

Brian Norman Jr Bombs Out Jin Sasaki with a Frightful Left Hook

Paro
Featured Articles13 hours ago

Liam Paro Returns with a Flourish on Wednesday’s ‘No Limit’ Card in Queensland

More-Medals-for-Hawaii's-Patricio-Family-at-USA-Boxing's-Summer-Festival
Featured Articles2 days ago

More Medals for Hawaii’s Patricio Family at the USA Boxing Summer Festival

Callum-Walsh-Umar-Dzambekov-and-Cain-Sandoval-Remain-Unbeaten-at-Santa-Ynez
Featured Articles4 days ago

Callum Walsh, Umar Dzambekov and Cain Sandoval Remain Unbeaten at Santa Ynez

Vito-Mielnicki-Whitewashes-Kamil-Gardzielik-Before-the-Home-Folks-in-Newark
Featured Articles4 days ago

Vito Mielnicki Jr Whitewashes Kamil Gardzielik Before the Home Folks in Newark

Avila-Perspective-Chap-331-Callum-Walsh-Brian-Norman-Galal-Yafai-and-More
Featured Articles5 days ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 331: Callum Walsh, Brian Norman, Galal Yafai and More

Brian-Norman-Jr-Bombs-Out-Jin-Sasaki-with-a-Frightful-Left-Hook
Featured Articles7 days ago

Brian Norman Jr Bombs Out Jin Sasaki with a Frightful Left Hook

A-Fight-Fan-and-Teremoana-Samson-Junior-Leon-Teremoana
Featured Articles1 week ago

A Fight Fan and Teremoana Samson Junior Leon Teremoana

Catching-Up-with-Clay-Moyle-Who-Talks-About-His-Massive-Collection-of-Boxing-Books
Featured Articles1 week ago

Catching Up with Clay Moyle Who Talks About His Massive Collection of Boxing Books

Richardson-Hitchins-Batters-and-Stops-George-Kambosos-at-Madison-Square-Garden
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Richardson Hitchins Batters and Stops George Kambosos at Madison Square Garden 

Avila-Perspective-Chap-330-Matchroom-in-New-York-plus-the-latest-on-Canelo-Crawford
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 330: Matchroom in New York plus the Latest on Canelo-Crawford

The-Shafting-of-Blair-the-Flair-Cobbs-a-Familar-Thread-in-the-Cruelest-Sport
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

The Shafting of Blair “The Flair” Cobbs, a Familiar Thread in the Cruelest Sport

Opetaia-and-Nakatani-Crush-Overmatched-Foes-Capping-Off-a-Wild-Boxing-Weekend
Featured Articles2 weeks ago

Opetaia and Nakatani Crush Overmatched Foes, Capping Off a Wild Boxing Weekend

Fabio-Wardley-Comes-from-Behind-to-KO-Justis-Huni
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Fabio Wardley Comes from Behind to KO Justis Huni  

Pacquiao-is-Back,-Fabio-in-England-and-More.jpg
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap 329: Pacquiao is Back, Fabio in England and More

Delving-Into-'Hoopa'-With-Notes-on-Books-by-George-Plimpton-and-Joyce-Carol-Oates
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Delving into ‘Hoopla’ with Notes on Books by George Plimpton and Joyce Carol Oates

Remembering-the-Under-Appreciated-Body-Snatcher-Mike-McCallum,-a-Conusmmate-Pro
Featured Articles3 weeks ago

Remembering the Under-Appreciated “Body Snatcher” Mike McCallum, a Consummate Pro    

A-Night-of-Mismatches-Turns-Topsy-Turvy-at-Mandalay-Bay-Resendiz-Shocks-Plant
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

A Night of Mismatches Turns Topsy-Turvy at Mandalay Bay; Resendiz Shocks Plant

Results-and-Recaps-from-Las-Vegas-Where-Melikuziev-Nipped-Fulghum-in-a-Fierce-Fight
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Results and Recaps from Las Vegas Where Melikuziev Nipped Fulghum in a Fierce Battle

Avila-Perspective-Chap-228-Viva-Las-Vegas-Back-in-the-Boxing-Spotlight
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Avila Perspective, Chap. 228: Viva Las Vegas, Back in the Boxing Spotlight

Vinny-Paz-is-Going-into-the-Boxing-Hall-of-Fame-Hey-why-Not-Roger-Mayweather?
Featured Articles4 weeks ago

Vinny Paz is Going into the Boxing Hall of Fame; Hey, Why Not Roger Mayweather?

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

Trending